(PULLITZER TIME) Mario & His Goomahs

The rampaging mysogynist titan in action.

Maybe this is all the late night coffee talking (typing), but I believe I have just had a revelation. Something deep, rather profound, and something that I feel certain will change the gaming landscape in quite an impressive fashion. That is, Super Mario and His Women.

This came to me while watching an episode of The Sopranos. Now, in this excellent drama series the lives of Italian Americans are documented. The programme dwells in particular detail on the criminal element of this particular social group, and amongst these ne’er do wells a term is used. The term is “goomha”. The name of the foot sloggers in the army of the evil King Bowser in Super Mario Bros/World/64/Sunshine/Galaxy et al is “Goomba”. The similarity is pronounced. What then is Miyamoto saying here?

Let us examine this in ragged, caffeine-driven, exhaustive detail.